For our first 2 children we were really excited to tell people that we were expecting. We knew that the people that we loved most would rejoice with us.
When Turkey Bottom #3 came along ... well, shock reigned. TB#2 was only 4 months old when we found out that I was expecting again. In my mind when Ben announced that I was pregnant AGAIN at church the whole congregation let out a collective gasp. That's really how I remember it.
Then came TB#4. I don't remember thinking that our family was going to throw a party when we announced that we were having ANOTHER baby.
We had the longest break between #3 and #4. Hannah and Emma are 18 months apart. Emma and Benjamin are 12 months, 9 days apart (those 9 days are very important to me). So between Benjamin and Gabriel there was a gap of 2 years and 2 months! It was a huge milestone, especially since my uterus was so thin when Benjamin was born that the surgeon claimed he could see through my uterian wall (at the incision). We had prayed earnestly that God would allow 2 years between TB#3 and TB#4. I needed that break.
There was some discussion during pregnancy #4 of having my tubes tied. There was no pressure from the doctors though I could tell the nurses thought I was crazy. 4 c-sections in 4 years seems to be a big deal... or maybe already having 4 kids and thinking about having more is a big deal??
19 months after the incredibly collicy TB#4 came the incredibly joyful TB#5. So for those of you trying to keep up... I had 5 Turkey Bottoms in 75 months via c-section. Again, I don't remember thinking that our parents and friends were going to be excited to hear the news that we were expecting #5. I think they were all holding their breath and praying that I would finally get my tubes tied.
And so it was. I had my tubes tied. Hubs and I were confident that we were making the right decision... the best decision based on the condition of my baby maker. I was tired of c-sections and the large number of complications that I have following them. I'm allergic to surgeries. Really. When they read my allergies to me they have to take a deep breath in the middle of the list. I'm allergic to latex. I'm allergic to adhesive tapes. I'm allergic to Benzoine... the surgecial glue that they use in place of stitches or staples. I'm allergic to Codiene (sp?) which means that most of the pain meds that they would normally give me I can't take. Spinals make me vomit. On top of all of that I'm an incredibly hard person to find a vein to put an IV into... which has always been weird to me since my skin is practically translucent... anywho, because I'm a "hard poke" I always have to have more than one nurse attempt to get more than one needle into my hand or inside of my wrist. I could really go on and on about all the things I HATE about c-sections. Not the least being women who deliver vaginally and tell me how easy I've had it... I could smack them. I still might actually.
And while I was tired of c-sections Hubs was tired of having a wife who was tired of c-sections. Not to mention a wife with serious baby blues. We should just call the "baby blues" the emotional rollercoaster of a seriously psycho woman. Hubs was also tired of getting up in the night with a baby... which he did at least once a night for me... he's my hero!
So here's the thing. I had my tubes tied. It was the right choice. But, there was always the hope that maybe God might open my womb one last time. Because if anyone could defy the odds and have another one (or maybe even twins) it would totally be me!
Monday's surgery ended any hope of that. There will be no more Driscoll babies. At least not naturally born... through the miracle of adoption my prayer is that we will add more turkies someday.
Having babies is more than adding to my collection of children. Having babies is really truly adding life to our home and to our world. Life. The beautiful miracle of life. It brings tears to my eyes. God has used my body as an instrument to bring life into this world. Every stretch mark is a road on the map of my life's journey. I am a mama. And in that reality I am beyond blessed.
Every moment of morning sickness, every moment of being exhausted and moody, every ache and pain and side effect of having those 5 c-sections... every moment worth it.
My baby maker is broken. But, I will continue to rejoice in the life that fills my home and praise God for my Turkey Bottoms and the journey He has given me.
When Turkey Bottom #3 came along ... well, shock reigned. TB#2 was only 4 months old when we found out that I was expecting again. In my mind when Ben announced that I was pregnant AGAIN at church the whole congregation let out a collective gasp. That's really how I remember it.
Then came TB#4. I don't remember thinking that our family was going to throw a party when we announced that we were having ANOTHER baby.
We had the longest break between #3 and #4. Hannah and Emma are 18 months apart. Emma and Benjamin are 12 months, 9 days apart (those 9 days are very important to me). So between Benjamin and Gabriel there was a gap of 2 years and 2 months! It was a huge milestone, especially since my uterus was so thin when Benjamin was born that the surgeon claimed he could see through my uterian wall (at the incision). We had prayed earnestly that God would allow 2 years between TB#3 and TB#4. I needed that break.
There was some discussion during pregnancy #4 of having my tubes tied. There was no pressure from the doctors though I could tell the nurses thought I was crazy. 4 c-sections in 4 years seems to be a big deal... or maybe already having 4 kids and thinking about having more is a big deal??
19 months after the incredibly collicy TB#4 came the incredibly joyful TB#5. So for those of you trying to keep up... I had 5 Turkey Bottoms in 75 months via c-section. Again, I don't remember thinking that our parents and friends were going to be excited to hear the news that we were expecting #5. I think they were all holding their breath and praying that I would finally get my tubes tied.
And so it was. I had my tubes tied. Hubs and I were confident that we were making the right decision... the best decision based on the condition of my baby maker. I was tired of c-sections and the large number of complications that I have following them. I'm allergic to surgeries. Really. When they read my allergies to me they have to take a deep breath in the middle of the list. I'm allergic to latex. I'm allergic to adhesive tapes. I'm allergic to Benzoine... the surgecial glue that they use in place of stitches or staples. I'm allergic to Codiene (sp?) which means that most of the pain meds that they would normally give me I can't take. Spinals make me vomit. On top of all of that I'm an incredibly hard person to find a vein to put an IV into... which has always been weird to me since my skin is practically translucent... anywho, because I'm a "hard poke" I always have to have more than one nurse attempt to get more than one needle into my hand or inside of my wrist. I could really go on and on about all the things I HATE about c-sections. Not the least being women who deliver vaginally and tell me how easy I've had it... I could smack them. I still might actually.
And while I was tired of c-sections Hubs was tired of having a wife who was tired of c-sections. Not to mention a wife with serious baby blues. We should just call the "baby blues" the emotional rollercoaster of a seriously psycho woman. Hubs was also tired of getting up in the night with a baby... which he did at least once a night for me... he's my hero!
So here's the thing. I had my tubes tied. It was the right choice. But, there was always the hope that maybe God might open my womb one last time. Because if anyone could defy the odds and have another one (or maybe even twins) it would totally be me!
Monday's surgery ended any hope of that. There will be no more Driscoll babies. At least not naturally born... through the miracle of adoption my prayer is that we will add more turkies someday.
Having babies is more than adding to my collection of children. Having babies is really truly adding life to our home and to our world. Life. The beautiful miracle of life. It brings tears to my eyes. God has used my body as an instrument to bring life into this world. Every stretch mark is a road on the map of my life's journey. I am a mama. And in that reality I am beyond blessed.
Every moment of morning sickness, every moment of being exhausted and moody, every ache and pain and side effect of having those 5 c-sections... every moment worth it.
My baby maker is broken. But, I will continue to rejoice in the life that fills my home and praise God for my Turkey Bottoms and the journey He has given me.
3 comments:
This truly was a very hard decision for you and your husband both. But of course your health is top priority and it is completely understandable. After all you have five children to raise!
Let me assure you that after also having five kids (two vaginal, three c-section-not in that order) that c-section is NOT the easier way to go. C-section is a serious surgery and takes so much longer to recover. I couldn't hold my babies after surgery, where as with natural delivery I was running around w/all the energy in the world.
I also want to thank you for making me feel a little better about decisions my husband and I have been considering. We really want another, but know that like you not everyone will be thrilled. This is our choice, if we do decide to have another it is because we have so much love to give and treasure our children more than anything. They truly are a blessing. I am getting older though (yes, it is true!) so like you (even though you are young) my health is top priority. Thanks Kelly for sharing this, you are not alone in your thoughts.
Cari B.
What a thorough recap of your baby maker :-)
I'm happy that you made it through your most recent surgery safely and that you'll be able to be around for the first five TBs. It sounds as if you and your husband have done nothing but give your life to God, each other, and your children. And to me, that sounds like a wonderful thing.
Keep up the great writing and parenting.
I'll be anxious to hear about any future adoption plans if and when they ever happen for your family.
Thanks Cari and Nathan!
I know that God is using our children as a testimony to His grace and generosity. I also know that I wouldn't change anything about the journey that He has taken me on to get me to where I am today.
Also, I would like to make note of the fact that though our families may not have rejoiced in the news of another pregnancy... they all love each of our children very much and were there to celebrate each of their births! It seems that sometimes parents worry about their Turkies no matter how old they are...
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