My niece tells me that I haven't blogged since Easter and that I need to get on it...
She also told me that she brags to her friends about my blog! Perhaps she knows that flattery works with me, but seriously, just the fact that she reads my blog is inspiration enough to get back in the swing of things!
Soooooo...
Yesterday I turned 35. I think of it as the beginning of middle age. And I have to tell you I kind of like it! The older I get the more I realize the less I know and the more I want to "figure it all out"... but the less pressure there is to "figure it all out"...
That probably didn't make a lot of sense, but like my sister says, "There's no other place in life I'd rather be." And that's exactly where I am! Life seems to get better with age.
As I was saying, before I started to ramble, yesterday was my birthday. I don't really have high expectations for birthdays. Not that I think they're going to all suck, but I'm also not ever expecting a huge surprise party where at the end Hotsauce announces that we're headed to some tropical island where children aren't allowed to keep asking the same question over and over and over and over again. Though, to be clear, I wouldn't object to said birthday party extravaganza!
To celebrate I was looking forward to going shopping. I'd been saving up my blow fund and I was ready to get a few new items into my closet. Our first stop on our shopping journey was Target. Target was relatively empty on this rainy Tuesday afternoon, but nevertheless when you head out shopping with five children, not matter how they behave, you can expect to draw attention.
Now, anyone with a larger family will have stories about comments people have made ... usually well intended, sometimes offensive, and for us almost always encouraging. But, I'm pretty sure our Target outing yesterday has topped the rest of our experiences.
You can imagine how thrilled Ben and the turkeys were to spend their afternoon shopping exclusively for me... they were all giggles and grins and some other adjective that starts with "g"... I don't know... I'm middle aged and the brain is failing...
I think out of shear excitement one of the kids exclaimed that they had to go to the bathroom. Since I was looking at a few shirts, Hotsauce decides to take the kid with him. Soon others children were volunteering to go to the bathroom too. You know, public restrooms are the single most wonderful places in all of shopping centers...
I notice a lady is kind of smirking as the majority of the turkeys realize they need to go to the potty all at the same time. Not thinking much of it I continue my shopping in earnest knowing that they won't be gone for long! When Ben returns the "Smirky" Lady mentions how well behaved our kids are being. Ben graciously thanks her.
She presses on. "No, really, they are very well behaved children."
Ben responds with another thank you.
A few seconds pass and she says to him again, "They are really great kids."
My Spidey senses are telling me that he's a little uncomfortable and he responds back, "Thank you. They're for sale if you want any of them."
They both laugh. I look up from my shirt hunting and smile nicely at her, acknowledging that I have heard her compliments and assume that we are moving in our separate directions now.
Another child decides they have to use the restroom. I believe this child was in the original group of potty goers and barely 3 minutes have passed since they've returned. On a normal day this would greatly annoy Ben, but I think believe he saw his way out of an awkward situation and took off with all of the kids except for Hannah who continues to shop with me.
Some time passes and I hear Smirky Compliment Lady telling another shopper that we have really good kids and before long she says, "And then he says, 'They're for sale!!!'" And her and the other lady have a laugh together.
Upon the group of restroom warriors return the Smirky Compliment Lady is beaming. She again tells Ben that the kids are so so so goooooood! To which he says, "Honestly they're very easy kids to parent." This answer seems unacceptable to the lady and she replies back, "Oh, no, they've got great parents!" He nods and thanks her again. I'm not exactly sure where he heads to at this point, but seeing that she's headed in my direction he pretends to look at something else for a bit.
I think about running, but can tell that she has me in her sights. I also feel Hannah's hesitation and she takes a step behind me.
"I don't know if you heard me telling your husband this, but I think you should know, you have the best kids on the planet!!"
Now, I don't know about the rest of you, but my immediate reaction is... On the planet??? Of course, I don't know this lady, but I think I can assume that she doesn't know every child on the planet. After all, there are a lot of children in... I don't know... say China, or India, or Africa, or heck the U.S. of A.
But, it does seem legit. She has observed their behavior for the last 15 minutes, 7.5 of those minutes they were in the bathroom, but still she's probably nailed this.
Not really knowing how to respond, I say to Hannah, "Hear that? You're one of the best kids on the planet!" I emphasised "on the planet" too. I couldn't help myself. But, this was quite the honor for my eldest daughter... what being in the Top 5 Best Children On The Planet!!
Poor Hannah just shakes her head no and sinks further back behind me.
Miss Smirks A Lot keeps at it. "Well you are! And you should know that people are thinking it! I was just telling that other lady that was shopping by us that you kids are the best kids I've ever seen."
So, wait, not only are you repeatedly stopping us your also dragging other unsuspecting shoppers into this weirdness??
"And you know why you're one of the best kids on the planet???"
Hannah shakes her head no and is silently begging me to get her away from this overly nice lady.
"Because you have the BEST PARENTS ON THE PLANET!!!"
And there you have it!
The boldest, most ridiculous, comment we have ever received while out in public with our children.
I'm sure that many of you with children will probably cry yourself to sleep tonight. What with falling short of our parenting genius smacking you in the face every time we go out into public and all, but I want you to know that there's room for you to become 1st Runners Up On The Planet. That's nothing to be ashamed of and you know what they say, "Shoot for the moon, if you miss you'll still be among the stars."
But, you'll never be us... said the best mother on the planet. ;)
She also told me that she brags to her friends about my blog! Perhaps she knows that flattery works with me, but seriously, just the fact that she reads my blog is inspiration enough to get back in the swing of things!
Soooooo...
Yesterday I turned 35. I think of it as the beginning of middle age. And I have to tell you I kind of like it! The older I get the more I realize the less I know and the more I want to "figure it all out"... but the less pressure there is to "figure it all out"...
That probably didn't make a lot of sense, but like my sister says, "There's no other place in life I'd rather be." And that's exactly where I am! Life seems to get better with age.
As I was saying, before I started to ramble, yesterday was my birthday. I don't really have high expectations for birthdays. Not that I think they're going to all suck, but I'm also not ever expecting a huge surprise party where at the end Hotsauce announces that we're headed to some tropical island where children aren't allowed to keep asking the same question over and over and over and over again. Though, to be clear, I wouldn't object to said birthday party extravaganza!
To celebrate I was looking forward to going shopping. I'd been saving up my blow fund and I was ready to get a few new items into my closet. Our first stop on our shopping journey was Target. Target was relatively empty on this rainy Tuesday afternoon, but nevertheless when you head out shopping with five children, not matter how they behave, you can expect to draw attention.
Now, anyone with a larger family will have stories about comments people have made ... usually well intended, sometimes offensive, and for us almost always encouraging. But, I'm pretty sure our Target outing yesterday has topped the rest of our experiences.
You can imagine how thrilled Ben and the turkeys were to spend their afternoon shopping exclusively for me... they were all giggles and grins and some other adjective that starts with "g"... I don't know... I'm middle aged and the brain is failing...
I think out of shear excitement one of the kids exclaimed that they had to go to the bathroom. Since I was looking at a few shirts, Hotsauce decides to take the kid with him. Soon others children were volunteering to go to the bathroom too. You know, public restrooms are the single most wonderful places in all of shopping centers...
I notice a lady is kind of smirking as the majority of the turkeys realize they need to go to the potty all at the same time. Not thinking much of it I continue my shopping in earnest knowing that they won't be gone for long! When Ben returns the "Smirky" Lady mentions how well behaved our kids are being. Ben graciously thanks her.
She presses on. "No, really, they are very well behaved children."
Ben responds with another thank you.
A few seconds pass and she says to him again, "They are really great kids."
My Spidey senses are telling me that he's a little uncomfortable and he responds back, "Thank you. They're for sale if you want any of them."
They both laugh. I look up from my shirt hunting and smile nicely at her, acknowledging that I have heard her compliments and assume that we are moving in our separate directions now.
Another child decides they have to use the restroom. I believe this child was in the original group of potty goers and barely 3 minutes have passed since they've returned. On a normal day this would greatly annoy Ben, but I think believe he saw his way out of an awkward situation and took off with all of the kids except for Hannah who continues to shop with me.
Some time passes and I hear Smirky Compliment Lady telling another shopper that we have really good kids and before long she says, "And then he says, 'They're for sale!!!'" And her and the other lady have a laugh together.
Upon the group of restroom warriors return the Smirky Compliment Lady is beaming. She again tells Ben that the kids are so so so goooooood! To which he says, "Honestly they're very easy kids to parent." This answer seems unacceptable to the lady and she replies back, "Oh, no, they've got great parents!" He nods and thanks her again. I'm not exactly sure where he heads to at this point, but seeing that she's headed in my direction he pretends to look at something else for a bit.
I think about running, but can tell that she has me in her sights. I also feel Hannah's hesitation and she takes a step behind me.
"I don't know if you heard me telling your husband this, but I think you should know, you have the best kids on the planet!!"
Now, I don't know about the rest of you, but my immediate reaction is... On the planet??? Of course, I don't know this lady, but I think I can assume that she doesn't know every child on the planet. After all, there are a lot of children in... I don't know... say China, or India, or Africa, or heck the U.S. of A.
But, it does seem legit. She has observed their behavior for the last 15 minutes, 7.5 of those minutes they were in the bathroom, but still she's probably nailed this.
Not really knowing how to respond, I say to Hannah, "Hear that? You're one of the best kids on the planet!" I emphasised "on the planet" too. I couldn't help myself. But, this was quite the honor for my eldest daughter... what being in the Top 5 Best Children On The Planet!!
Poor Hannah just shakes her head no and sinks further back behind me.
Miss Smirks A Lot keeps at it. "Well you are! And you should know that people are thinking it! I was just telling that other lady that was shopping by us that you kids are the best kids I've ever seen."
So, wait, not only are you repeatedly stopping us your also dragging other unsuspecting shoppers into this weirdness??
"And you know why you're one of the best kids on the planet???"
Hannah shakes her head no and is silently begging me to get her away from this overly nice lady.
"Because you have the BEST PARENTS ON THE PLANET!!!"
And there you have it!
The boldest, most ridiculous, comment we have ever received while out in public with our children.
I'm sure that many of you with children will probably cry yourself to sleep tonight. What with falling short of our parenting genius smacking you in the face every time we go out into public and all, but I want you to know that there's room for you to become 1st Runners Up On The Planet. That's nothing to be ashamed of and you know what they say, "Shoot for the moon, if you miss you'll still be among the stars."
But, you'll never be us... said the best mother on the planet. ;)
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