With temperatures in the 70s and 5 children asking begging to go to the park we decided we could hold them off no longer... especially one persistent 6 year old boy who's life would surely end if we didn't make it there today!
We went out to grab the Turkey Bottoms and before long a neighbor girl asked her mom if she could come with us... her mom agreed. I think her eyes even twinkled in a way that all moms hope they hide, but other moms pick up on easily. You know, the look of freedom. As we were taking off the girl across the street came home from school and was about ready to cross the street when one of our children announced that we were headed to the park. So Hotsauce, dutifully walked over and asked her mom if she could join us too! I imagine she had that same look also... especially since she works out of the home all day.
While waiting for girl-across-the-street and for Benjamin to return his fireman hat into the house along came two other neighbor kids from school. They joined us also. So with 9 kids in tow, some on bikes and others with little legs hurrying to catch up we journeyed to the park. And wouldn't you know that while we were there 2 more kids from our neighborhood showed up. So that's 4 eyes on 11 kiddos... all who were very well behaved and actually made the day far more enjoyable than our meager family of 7!
I wish the same could be said of another boy who was around the ripe age of 9 or 10... he was at the park accompanied by a 6 or 7 month old brother and an 18 month old brother and his mom. Upon arrival I hear his mom say his name in that disgusted tone that can only mean she is done... and I mean DONE! He ignores her and goes on with his business of being naughty. When she tries to get his attention again he replies:
"Mom you're so retarded that you shove batteries up your butt so you can have some power."
Ben and I sucked all the oxygen out of a three block radius, both from sheer shock and in anticipation of the fury that will surely befall this ... this... this... disrespectful child who really has a snowball's chance in hell to become a contributing member of society... and then it happened... His mother dropped her voice an octive and said:
"That's really inappropriate, you know."
And the child responded with laughter:
"Yeah, but it's really funny."
And that was that.
Ben and I, of course, exchanged a look that lasted a mere half second that communicated to the other:
"Oh.my.word.if.that.was.our.child...You've.got.to.be.kidding.that's.all.you.got?...You both need spankings. And so much more."
Now, I know that when your child acts out and you're out in public that it's really hard to know exactly what to do and I will also admit that my children have gotten away with more then they should... but this was beyond "inappropriate".
As you may have guessed they stuck around and played awhile longer before the mom announced that it was time to go home because she was tired and still needed to make supper. The child flat told his mom, "NO" and that he wasn't going yet. So she stayed awhile longer. Again she announced it was time to go and started getting her two younger sons ready to leave. Oldest boy says, "Just one more slide."
Now we have all been here and we have all given into the "One more slide," request... even when it's accompanied by a whine. I've even seen moms give in to this request when it comes with kicking, screaming and throwing a fit on the floor of McDonalds. But, I've never seen it work after a child has called his mom a "powerless retard". Which is obviously an offensive term that no child should ever use, but when using it to his mother's face is without words, but he did prove his point that his mother truly doesn't have any power when it comes to being an authority figure in the life of her 9 year old child.
When mom finally convinced her son to leave the playground he was upset and called her fat, maybe even a big fatty, but I can't be completely sure of that. Upon hearing this my eyes doubled in size and my mouth dropped open.
"How many times do I have to tell you not to call me that? Just wait until we get home."
Son: "No, mom. No!"
"That's it. I've told you a hundred times not to call me that and now when we get home..."
"No, mom!! No!!!!!"
"...I'm going to whoop your ass..."
Are you serious? He's called you that a hundred times before and he still has teeth? I am going to make a major assumption here and say that there must not be a dad (or his dad) in the picture. Why? Because if any of my children would have ever said that to me their Dad would have knocked them into next week. But, even further than that my children would never say that to me because they have been trained by their father that not only is that inappropriate, it won't be tolerated! And why won't it be tolerated? Because God commands that "children obey your parents in the Lord for this is right." And if dads don't teach their children what is right and what is wrong, then this is what happens. This boy has no boundaries, no respect for authority, no direction or purpose, no idea what is right.
I believe that each one of us has a need for authority and a need to know how to operate under it. I further believe that we have a small period of time to train our children the up in the benefits of obedience and the consequences of rebellion. During the early years we give them a gift far beyond worldly riches that will guide their lives. Some people would say that it is far too early to predict the path that this young boy will travel, but I would imagine that it will not be an easy one and will likely end up in destruction. Of course, I can not predict if God will get a hold of him and his heart, but apart from Him there is little hope for this young boy.
And that's the saddest part of this whole story. A lost little boy who needs a father who loves him enough to discipline him, to train him in the way that he should go, to teach him what it means to respect and to be respected.
We went out to grab the Turkey Bottoms and before long a neighbor girl asked her mom if she could come with us... her mom agreed. I think her eyes even twinkled in a way that all moms hope they hide, but other moms pick up on easily. You know, the look of freedom. As we were taking off the girl across the street came home from school and was about ready to cross the street when one of our children announced that we were headed to the park. So Hotsauce, dutifully walked over and asked her mom if she could join us too! I imagine she had that same look also... especially since she works out of the home all day.
While waiting for girl-across-the-street and for Benjamin to return his fireman hat into the house along came two other neighbor kids from school. They joined us also. So with 9 kids in tow, some on bikes and others with little legs hurrying to catch up we journeyed to the park. And wouldn't you know that while we were there 2 more kids from our neighborhood showed up. So that's 4 eyes on 11 kiddos... all who were very well behaved and actually made the day far more enjoyable than our meager family of 7!
I wish the same could be said of another boy who was around the ripe age of 9 or 10... he was at the park accompanied by a 6 or 7 month old brother and an 18 month old brother and his mom. Upon arrival I hear his mom say his name in that disgusted tone that can only mean she is done... and I mean DONE! He ignores her and goes on with his business of being naughty. When she tries to get his attention again he replies:
"Mom you're so retarded that you shove batteries up your butt so you can have some power."
Ben and I sucked all the oxygen out of a three block radius, both from sheer shock and in anticipation of the fury that will surely befall this ... this... this... disrespectful child who really has a snowball's chance in hell to become a contributing member of society... and then it happened... His mother dropped her voice an octive and said:
"That's really inappropriate, you know."
And the child responded with laughter:
"Yeah, but it's really funny."
And that was that.
Ben and I, of course, exchanged a look that lasted a mere half second that communicated to the other:
"Oh.my.word.if.that.was.our.child...You've.got.to.be.kidding.that's.all.you.got?...You both need spankings. And so much more."
Now, I know that when your child acts out and you're out in public that it's really hard to know exactly what to do and I will also admit that my children have gotten away with more then they should... but this was beyond "inappropriate".
As you may have guessed they stuck around and played awhile longer before the mom announced that it was time to go home because she was tired and still needed to make supper. The child flat told his mom, "NO" and that he wasn't going yet. So she stayed awhile longer. Again she announced it was time to go and started getting her two younger sons ready to leave. Oldest boy says, "Just one more slide."
Now we have all been here and we have all given into the "One more slide," request... even when it's accompanied by a whine. I've even seen moms give in to this request when it comes with kicking, screaming and throwing a fit on the floor of McDonalds. But, I've never seen it work after a child has called his mom a "powerless retard". Which is obviously an offensive term that no child should ever use, but when using it to his mother's face is without words, but he did prove his point that his mother truly doesn't have any power when it comes to being an authority figure in the life of her 9 year old child.
When mom finally convinced her son to leave the playground he was upset and called her fat, maybe even a big fatty, but I can't be completely sure of that. Upon hearing this my eyes doubled in size and my mouth dropped open.
"How many times do I have to tell you not to call me that? Just wait until we get home."
Son: "No, mom. No!"
"That's it. I've told you a hundred times not to call me that and now when we get home..."
"No, mom!! No!!!!!"
"...I'm going to whoop your ass..."
Are you serious? He's called you that a hundred times before and he still has teeth? I am going to make a major assumption here and say that there must not be a dad (or his dad) in the picture. Why? Because if any of my children would have ever said that to me their Dad would have knocked them into next week. But, even further than that my children would never say that to me because they have been trained by their father that not only is that inappropriate, it won't be tolerated! And why won't it be tolerated? Because God commands that "children obey your parents in the Lord for this is right." And if dads don't teach their children what is right and what is wrong, then this is what happens. This boy has no boundaries, no respect for authority, no direction or purpose, no idea what is right.
I believe that each one of us has a need for authority and a need to know how to operate under it. I further believe that we have a small period of time to train our children the up in the benefits of obedience and the consequences of rebellion. During the early years we give them a gift far beyond worldly riches that will guide their lives. Some people would say that it is far too early to predict the path that this young boy will travel, but I would imagine that it will not be an easy one and will likely end up in destruction. Of course, I can not predict if God will get a hold of him and his heart, but apart from Him there is little hope for this young boy.
And that's the saddest part of this whole story. A lost little boy who needs a father who loves him enough to discipline him, to train him in the way that he should go, to teach him what it means to respect and to be respected.
